Treasures in darkness

I will give you the treasures of darkness, riches stored in secret places,
so that you may know that I am the Lord, the God of Israel, who summons you by name.
-Isaiah 45:3

This was a sweet truth that was shared during the women's conference I got to attend earlier this month for staff in our region. For once, I felt comfortable in my skin and not insecure. I think because of where I am personally and with the Lord, this was the best conference I have been to since I've been on staff (almost 6 years). It was sweet. And this verse stuck out. I began this school year full of questions and insecurities and in darkness. Even though I still experience dark places and trials, the Lord is using truths like this to show me that it's not all bad. Treasures in darkness...really? Yes, really. And it may not be the treasure I'm expecting, but one treasure is always the Lord. He is with me, even in the darkness.


If I say, "Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me, "
even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you.
-Psalm 139: 11,12

Forgiveness

I love Jesus. Yesterday I had a counselling appointment, and I've been sharing my history for several appointments now. She has asked questions about my parents, grandparents, siblings, schools, jobs, etc. By the time the session was over yesterday, we were discussing my dating history and I only got to the end of my junior year of high school...when I broke a good guy's heart by kissing another guy and breaking up with him to date the other. Yuck! My heart hurt as I talked about it. But soon after that, as my counselor was praying for me, I quickly felt the Lord's Peace again. He reminded me of what he did on the cross and also reminded me of the sweet moment when I was a freshman at Southwest Missouri State and I was sitting in an auditorium in Hill Hall (with over 100 other people) when I first heard that His coming, death, and resurrection were powerful, were real, and were for me. I fell in LOVE with Jesus. He forgave me a long time ago, and even though there is still hurt when I talk about my past, I know it is just out of my own disappointment and regret, but not out of shame. My past and the lessons I have learned have helped to shape me into who I am and who the Lord is still changing. To sweeten this reminder, as I was driving home, there were two songs that played that were radio hits from my early college career. One was from Lifehouse (fun and full of truth) and the other from Smashmouth (just fun). I had the windows down and turned up the radio. I sang along and just delighted in sweet memories of my relationship with Jesus.

A craving

I'm about 13 weeks along, and I have not had a craving for anything in weeks. Tonight, I decided to actually try and plan some meals again. The first thing on my list...Emily's White Chicken Chili from the Cru Chili Cookoff '09. :) I need to actually print the recipe because I've made it several times, but always go to Amber's blog to find it. Thank goodness for the internet. ;) Amber's post recommends Fritos as a garnish. So, while I'm not making the chili until tomorrow, my sweet hubby is on his way to Safeway right now to buy me a bag of Fritos so I can start munching on them tonight! I'm really looking forward to my salty snack. The little things. :)

Papa

I mentioned grandpa. Luke started saying "Papa".

Actually, he usually whispers it.

My parents came to visit for a couple days, then traveled around Arizona & Utah, and then stopped in Greeley for a couple more days before returning to good ole C.B.

It was sweet to see Luke enjoying his grandpa. Even now, after they are back in the midwest, Luke still asks for "Papa." He's attached. ;)

From Jesus

"I am with you always."

Matthew 28:20

"The Lord's promises are pure..."
-Proverbs 12:6

The gift of friendship

I've been feeling a bit depressed lately. No particular reason why. Just life, etc. This past Thursday night, we had dinner with some sweet friends of ours (Elizabeth & Josh). They invited us over & Elizabeth made a very tasty dinner & dessert (good ole chocolate chip cookies) & it was just fun to catch up with them about their winter break. I left their apartment feeling refreshed and even inspired.

Later that night, Brett asked me if I would like to go out for breakfast the next morning. Let's just say this doesn't happen on a regular basis. :) To sweeten the deal for him, I let him know places we could go because we had coupons! We decided to try a local place called Randy's Diner. We showed up, and almost every vehicle in the parking lot was a truck. We had a feeling we were going to like this place. We went inside, and I asked if we sat ourselves. The waitress confirmed that we should seat ourselves and that she'd be with us in a minute. As we began our quest for a table, I was looking for a high chair for Luke. All of a sudden, Brett stopped. It was like he had noticed someone he knew and was going to chat with them. When I looked at the table, there sat my friends, Katie (who lives in Bloomington, IN) and Jill (who lives in Omaha, NE). I've known them since middle school and Katie was my maid of honor. My mind wasn't registering what was happening, and once it did, I said "What the heck?" I also started to cry. I was overwhelmed with joy. My sweet husband had asked my friends to surprise me for my 30th birthday. I soon found out that another good friend from Omaha, Philly, was supposed to join them, but her precious little daughter got sick. It was an awesome breakfast, for multiple reasons. :)

On the ride back to our house, I heard the words from Brett that I needed to hear. "When I planned this, it was my expectation that I would watch Luke so you could do whatever you wanted with the girls." I felt so much freedom after hearing this. I may have even teared up again. The girls and I spent the rest of the day in Boulder...Celestial Seasonings tour (we got to wear hair nets!), Pearl Street, and a tasty Italian restaurant.

The next day I drove down to Denver (they were staying with Jill's brother-in-law) and we spent a little time at the Colorado Mills mall and then had lunch at On the Border. We all had also been watching the weather. Snow was in the forecast, and it had already begun to snow in Nebraska. Jill decided that she should cut her trip short, since she was driving. It was a wise choice, but we were bummed to see her go. I then spent the rest of the day with Kate showing her Washington Park, South Pearl Street in Denver, and of course, we had to stop at the REI flagship store. :) We then headed back to Greeley where we picked up the boys and then had dinner at $1.50 a Scoop. Quantity. Not necessarily quality. ;) Brett & Kate both were fighting sicknesses, so Sunday was spent eating yummy food at home and watching a movie, until it was time to take Katie to the airport.

Brett, in a way, gave me the sweet gift of friendship by arranging this surprise. It was a gift I desperately needed but didn't know I needed. My heart has felt so much joy by the thoughtfulness, kindness, generousity, and love of my friends and hubby, even though my friends are back at home. I am blessed with the best of friends.